Oxford County, Maine police received a tip that Nicholas Palmer was growing marijuana on his Otisfield property. According to an article on SunJournal.com police, acting on a tip, sent a certified drug spotter (!?!) in a helicopter over Palmer’s property while Sheriff’s Corporal Chancey Libby drove onto the property to speak to Palmer. Approaching Palmer’s house Libby spotted marijuana plants growing in the yard. He returned with a warrant, searched Palmer’s property, and discovered 52 plants that resulted in a criminal charge against Palmer for cultivating marijuana.
While searching Palmer’s outbuildings police discovered skeletal deer remains and, thinking the deer may have been poached, called in game wardens. The game wardens were more interested in small ponds on Palmer’s property, ponds that contained largemouth bass — illegally-stocked largemouth bass. Illegally-stocked, sexually-active largemouth bass. (They can identify such things. That’s why they’re the game wardens.) They confiscated eight adult fish and charged Palmer with illegally stocking fish in a private pond.
Palmer pled guilty to both charges. On the charge of cultivating marijuana he received a fine of $250, or $4.81/plant. On the charge of illegally stocking fish he received a fine of $1,100, or $137.50 per confiscated fish. The state also revoked his fishing license for five years and eradicated the fish remaining in his ponds. “Palmer’s fish fine and lengthy license revocation were stiff because illegal fish stockings can potentially impact entire watersheds” said a Maine Warden Service spokesman.
There’s at least one unmined joke in this story about a Phish concert. Feel free to dig it out.