From Twitter to Quitter

Reuters reports that Twitter’s retention rate after one month is about 40 percent.  In other words 6 out of 10 new users stop using it within 30 days.  Facebook’s current retention rate is about 70 percent.  I understand how a user could find it difficult to compete with celebrity tweets from Oprah, Miley Cyrus, and Ashton Kutcher, which is why I offer gratis my suggestions for Twitter offshoots:

  • Jitter, for users addicted to coffee and energy drinks;
  • Bitter, for users upset by relationship and work setbacks;
  • Critter, for pet-centric users; and
  • Litter, for 100% disposable messages

The possibilities are endless.

5 thoughts on “From Twitter to Quitter”

  1. why not Spitter, for smokers;
    Fritter, for the hungry internet surfer;
    Glitter, for those missing kindergarten; and
    Knitter, in case you’re cold.

  2. or hitter, for those who still listen to chris brown even though rihanna’s face looked like a bruised peach
    sitter, for those who need babysitting jobs because they can’t find internships
    fitter, for the fitness obsessed
    pitter, for those who like fruits without seeds
    and ritter, for those who still listen to tex the singing cowboy

  3. At least with Twitter you know what to expect. The ever changing Facebook rules/layouts are starting to get annoying. I’m 21, is it cool to be ‘friends’ with people’s parents?

    My roommate excitedly called me over this morning because the creators of Twitter were on the view pushing the whole “Twitter can save your life” example from the Egyptian jail.

    Regardless, several of my friends have complained that Twitter has killed my blog.

  4. Today, I went to the beach with my kids. I found a sea shell and gave it to my 4 year old
    daughter and said “You can hear the ocean if you put this to your ear.” She placed the shell to her ear and screamed.
    There was a hermit crab inside and it pinched her ear. She never wants
    to go back! LoL I know this is completely off topic but I had to tell someone!

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